YONI SPEAK

Imagine a world where it was safe to be a woman, safe to be a girl, and grow up with positive images of girls and women. Images that show women as smart, strong, confident, loving themselves just the way they are, in all body types, all ages, and free from any constraints regarding their sexuality. To live in a world where being female was not something that needed to be defended, protected, hidden or exploited, but rather honored, respected, loved and supported. What would it feel like to live in a world where feminine values were an integral part of the culture? I am asking these questions because I have been doing research recently on the subject of “girl world” or what it means to be a girl growing up in the 21st Century, and I have to say I am horrified. Now I know this is a rather strong word to be using but it nevertheless is true. Having a Goddaughter who just turned 15 I decided to do some serious reading regarding the current sexualization of girls and children by th...

How do women define what makes them look and feel sexy? This is a question I have asked myself for quite some time. I even offer a workshop for women exploring this very issue. Women have been told for hundreds if not thousands of years what they have to look like in order to be a “sexy” woman. Each culture has its own definition of beauty and what a sexually attractive woman is, and these attitudes are reflected in the way women are told to dress, behave and act. Today we have Madison Ave., fashion magazines, movies and music lyrics that tell us how you can be a “sexier” you. We are constantly bombarded with messages that tell us how we should look, act, think, feel and what we should wear in order to be a sex goddess, have a fulfilling sex life, have the man of our dreams and so on. With all of our advancement in the workplace, in some political arenas and in with some of our male/female relationships, women are still living within the framework of the old paradigm that wa...

Hundreds of girls are seeking a way to escape their lives. Most come from a middle to lower income family, in small towns across America. These girls are not necessarily coming from an abusive home or severe poverty. Most have both parents at home, who love them and want only the best for their daughters, and some are on their way to college when they see this ad and take a detour. Hot Girls Wanted is the titIe of a documentary on Netflix. The subject of this film was the story of five girls who went into the amateur porn industry and what happened to them along the way. An ad on Craigslist offered a free flight to Miami and promised work as a star in the amateur porn industry earning up to $3000 a film. The amateur porn industry has been on the rise. Today it is a multi-billion dollar industry that is attracting young women ages 18-25 from all over the country. The allure is freedom and more money than they have ever made.  For the girls in this documentary it sounds l...

What is the New Millennium Woman? What are the qualities of this type of woman? How can we recognize this woman when we meet her? What will she look like, sound like, feel like? We are living in one of the most exciting and transformative times on earth. We have entered into a New Age, some say it is the Aquarian Age that has been foretold in sacred texts, and because of this, those who are called are beginning to acquire a new set of skills and evolving into a true "human being." The times we are living in are now dictating this new human. We are becoming more awake to our true nature and staying connected to our source, we are evolving into our enlightened selves our essence.   The New Millennium Woman a woman of the New World, is a woman of her own creation.   It has been thirteen years since the beginning of the New Millennium. Hard to believe how fast the time has gone by and the first wave of this new Era is well on its way. We have passed through many of t...

Which aspect of the Goddess of Love and Sexuality do you most identify with?  Is it  Aphrodite,  goddess of love, beauty, and sensuality?  Or perhaps  Shakti , the Primal Goddess of creation, the life force? Or do you see yourself more as a priestess of the Goddess, such as a Temple Prostitute or a Sexual Healer? The Goddess of love and sexuality has many names and aspects. She represents a side of the  Divine Feminine  that depicts women’s sensual and sexual nature as well as their abilities to heal and transmute sexual energy. These goddess archetypes have often been seen from a very narrow point of view based on the time that they were created in. The mythology of any culture always reflects the values of that culture and so do the pantheon of gods and goddesses that are created. What was once said about Aphrodite in Greek society is not necessarily what she represents for modern women today. Archetypes must change and reflect the current ...

Sexual healing as a profession is a fairly recent phenomenon beginning with Sex Therapy and over the past 15 years, broadening to include trained and certified sexual healers, also known as Sacred Intimates, Sexological Bodyworkers, Dakas, and Dakinis. For decades these courageous women and men have offered their services to women who have bravely sought them out for a deeper awakening to their sexuality. For hundreds of years, women have hardly been allowed to have any sexual libido at all and if they did they were classified as hysterical. The medical profession gave this name to the symptoms of women who had too much pent-up sexual energy in the Victorian Age and treated it with hands-on therapy provided by a physician. This doctor would stimulate the clitoris of the patient until she had an orgasm or paroxysm (release of tension). Of course, they also thought that a lobotomy would calm the woman down and so many hundreds if not thousands of women were literally made into zombies ...

Has the beauty myth gone too far?  In today's culture, I think it has. After recently reading about female genital mutilation practices in Africa and other Muslin countries, it seems that women in our own culture are doing something that is not far akin to mutilating themselves voluntarily. Of course, the FGM practices are far more extensive and the repercussions far more harmful to the woman but that does not mean that when a young woman feels her genitalia does not look normal and decides to have her labia lips essentially cut off that it is not as serious. It seems that way to me. I have recently become aware of the growing fad of what is commonly called, labiaplasty and vaginoplasty.  Since 2016 there has been a  39%  increase in labiaplasty surgeries. which can roughly be estimated at more than 12,000 women. This fact still astonishes me and saddens me at the same time. Recent research done by Refinery 29 who took a poll of 3,670 women stated that 43% of t...